Toilet Paper Rollage of 2023: The Year of the Squatty
Breaking News: Toilet paper is in short supply, but Squatty's in stock!
Causes:
- Unprecedented demand for Squatty wipes
- Global shortage of tree sap
- Elon Musk's robotic toilet paper factories are on strike
- Chinchillas are secretly hoarding the last rolls
Effects:
- Public bathrooms are now officially called "Squatty's" instead of "Toilets"
- People are using their hair as emergency toilet paper
- Stock prices of toilet paper are skyrocketing
- Elon Musk is now the self-proclaimed "Toilet King"
Toilet Paper Hoarding 101